Opening Night Success

 


New Lenox, IL - Softball is back at the Lions Den as High Voltage took on Corona ended the world. Corona may not have ended the world, but High Voltage ended the night early with a run scoring barrage that culminated in an opening night 17 - 2 victory in four short innings.  Coming into the game, Capn' Jack has stated that this might be the deepest team ever from a talent prospective.  With that, Jack ledoff the season with a single to open the action which led to four first inning runs.  High Voltage batted around in the second inning to extend to 11 runs.  Gazette reporter Helen Keller did not keep the scorebook for Corona so it is assumed that Ryno walked five men consecutively for the opposing team's two runs.   HV kept the foot on the gas pedal with a five-spot in the third inning to lead 15 - 2, and ultimately ended the game on a walkoff Stapes single (more on that later) to score Jeff for an early 17 -2 victory.  High Voltage face their first real test of the season next week as they take on Paradise Bay (formerly Ivy League) at 6:30 PM.

Notables:

New Kid - Jay Modelski became the 71st player to take an at-bat for the HV franchise.  After going 3 for 3, he zooms up to 46th on the team's all time hit list.  

While We're At It - Noah in his third career game with HV moved up to 42nd on the hit list with his 1 for 3 effort last night.  The lone hit was a home run.

Bragging Rights...for now - After just one week, Jake, Jeff, and Noah are tied for the team lead in home runs.  Yes, you read that correctly.  Jeff is ahead of Sutes in team homeruns. When asked about the early season anomaly, Jeff deadpanned; "Not an anomaly sir.  I've been juicing all winter long and do not plan on stopping the homerun barrage any time soon".  There you have it, another HR threat that needs keeping an eye on.

Props on the Props - Corona ended the world wore matching light blue plain t-shirt jerseys. Most teams that have been around for more than a year or two are lucky if guys are wearing pants, let alone matching unis.  Well played Corona.

Not So Well Played - If you look at the schedule, the official team name is Corona ended the world.  Really?  What is worse than one of the shittiest names we've ever heard?  Not putting caps on ended and world.  So far, there is a debate of what is shittier, the team's name or the team.  Hold all tickets, that is a photo finish.

Speaking of Debate - There are less than a handful of guys that the Gazette can call out and they are ok with it.  Matt Sutor is one of those guys.  Matt accepts critiques as well as any Volt.  Brace yourself Sutes, it's coming.  Last night's game was out of hand with the Volts leading 16 -2 with Jeff on third base representing the game ending run with no outs.  Koz was also on first base at the time that Stapes ended the game with a run producing single to score Jeff.  Game over.  Debate begins.  Apparently it was argued that Jeff should have stayed on third to keep the bases loaded so that Sutes could hit a homerun "for tie breaker purposes".  COME ON MAN!!!  If I were on the hill and the game ending run did not score from third on a single, a few things would happen.  The next batter would get walked on three pitches just to be spiteful.  Those three pitches would be heaters aimed at the batter's head. The offending team would then be marked as the biggest jags on earth. Let's have some fun out there and remain the classiest team in the league.  Rant over.

No Crate - Well, da commish finally did it.  The dangerous milk crate was removed from the batter's box. Thank you for your concern New Lenox Park District, now maybe you can get a few bags of clay to fill the hole that you left.

Where's Waldo - Missing from last night's proceedings was the affable Ken.  The Gazette has Scoop Brady on the case to find Ken's whereabouts and will file a report as soon as he is contacted.  The last time Ken was seen was in the green fields of Ireland.  We hope you are ok and find your way back home soon.

Hard to Find Good Help - Ask for the time and temp for the opener, and what do you get?  The time and temp from a Sunday morning practice where three guys show up.  


Where's Waldo II - Pratl was not at last night's game.  We cannot confirm nor deny that Deb was or was not at the game last night either.  This not having a reporter at the game thing is really getting in the way of accurate reporting.

Short Circuit - With all due respect to the Live Wires, we will no longer be using that name as the Livest Wire of them all is missing.  Applications will be taken for the Volts "better half" fan base.

New Plastic - Capn' Jack finally replaced the tattered plastic protector on the lineup chart.  Maybe the team can kick in for a longer slip of paper as it looks as if Modell is a half inch or so short.  At least Jack centered the tab.








Sheer Strength - Apparently Zlogar is juicing too.  His new hobby is ripping bats in two and looking constipated.  Keep up the good work Z.  btw...................Z, now is the time to get in on the action on the NLCPD with the new facility build next to I-355.  








Where's Waldo III - Oh no, not Arik with an A.  What is going on here?

By The Numbers

Jack- 3/4 - 3 Runs

Jeff- 3/4 - 2B, 3B, HR, 3 Runs, 3 RBI

Jake- 3/4 - HR, 2 Runs, 4 RBI

Jason- 3/3 - BB, 2 2B, 3 Runs, 2 RBI

Sutor- 3/3 - 3B, 2 Runs, 2 RBI

Noah- 1/3 - HR, 2 Runs, 3 RBI

Jay- 3/3 - 2B, 1 Run, 1 RBI

Zlogar- 3/3 - 2B, 3B, 3 RBI

Dylan- 0/2 - BB

Foster- 1/3 - 1 Run


Note: Thank you to Ray Charles for the stats


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